


Haunted

by Pinx_B



Category: BanG Dream! (Anime)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Future Fic, Light Angst, Romance, Yuri
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:35:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26332753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Pinx_B/pseuds/Pinx_B
Summary: Following her departure from Tokyo 3 years prior, Arisa returns home in a bid to reconcile with Saaya and the past..
Relationships: Ichigaya Arisa/Yamabuki Saaya
Comments: 6
Kudos: 46





	Haunted

* * *

It was akin to déjà vu. 

How many times had she stood there in front of the bakery window just to get a glimpse of Saaya since they had first met?

Arisa chuckled to herself, old habits die hard.

Even after 3 years away, it had done little to diminish her feelings for Saaya.

Not that Arisa was hoping for that to be the case but it did reinstate that whatever she had been feeling for the brunette wasn't a fleeting sensation.

The timing for them to develop into something more was just wrong.

Everything went wrong after her grandparents died and not so soon after each other which left the blonde detached. She made the decision to study away from here, to head back to Kyoto instead in a means of gathering herself as she dealt with the grief. As much as it hurt to be away from Saaya and the rest of her friends, Arisa knew it was the only way to move forward.

But as she stood there, watching Saaya move around the store with such grace and that irritatingly alluring smile still on her face, Arisa wondered just how much had changed.

Well, for one, she wasn't going to wait around like she normally had done in the past so she made her way to the door, her hand hesitating for a moment before she shook her head to get her brain to work.

The ambrosial scent of freshly baked goods enveloped her, coaxing a smile to form on her lips as waves of nostalgia blossomed within her. No matter how many other bakeries she had tried whilst in Kyoto, all of them failed to replicate the Yamabuki's bakery.

Though, she might be a little biased.

Saaya had her back turned to her when she heard the chime on the door ring, "Welcome! I won't be a second!" she stated cheerily, hands busy restocking some sandwiches.

"Busy as always, huh".

The brunette's palms halted in mid air, eyes widening slightly as the lilting voice that hadn't faded over the years surrounded her, lulling her and she wondered if she was hearing things.

Sure, Arisa's accent was a tad unique, one that she hadn't heard in a long time barring from the few occasional phone and video calls during the first year she was gone.

But what were the odds of another woman with a similar tone, a cadence of the voice she had come to love standing behind her?

Saaya willed for the apprehension in her stomach to subside as she put the sandwich down and turned around.

She took in a sharp breath, "Arisa".

The blonde gave a little wave, "Long time no see, Saaya".

Without waiting for another second to pass by, Saaya rounded the corner and walked out into the main bakery area. Her heart pounded away as she slowed down, refraining from launching herself at Arisa just in case it wasn't what she wanted.

She had every recollection of how fractious Arisa was with physical contact and she didn't want to scare her away.

It left her hands awkwardly part way in the air and Arisa noticed them, stifling a feigned sigh as her own nerves were engulfing her.

Same old considerate Saaya.

In a few hurried steps, she closed the distance between them and threw her arms behind Saaya's shoulders as the brunette wrapped her arms around Arisa's waist and practically lifted her up from the floor in an easy sweep.

"You're back".

Arisa didn't say anything; no words, no indignation, no refusal.

She stewed in her own solicitude of wondering _how_ Saaya would react to her return.

Goodness, how she had dreamt of being this close to Saaya again every day that had passed. So she hugged her back harder when her feet landed on the floor again, burying her face against Saaya's shoulder, her eyes clenched shut to conceal the tears.

Saaya relaxed at the feeling of the shorter woman in her arms and let her gather her thoughts. This was just as overwhelming for Arisa as it was for her so she rubbed the blonde's back while keeping her other hand firmly around Arisa's hips.

They forgot that they were in the bakery till a clatter of someone in the kitchen doing something caught their attention. Arisa moved her head back to look up into Saaya's eyes which was a mistake because to see them up close again, taking in the darker blue flecks made her knees waver.

"Yeah, I wasn't sure when you would be finished up so.." she stalled, trying to think up an excuse but nothing but incoherent mumbling came out which made Saaya grin.

"Glad to see that not much has changed with you, Arisa".

"Easy for you to say" Arisa smirked, "You're taller than I remember".

"3 years is a long time away..".

The sombre tone in Saaya's voice didn't go amiss, neither did the longing gaze in those fiery cerulean eyes.

Saaya was skilled at concealing her feelings so to see the essence of her sadness seep out resulted in Arisa's heart tugging around itself.

"I'm sorry".

Saaya pressed her palm against Arisa's back, "Arisa, that wasn't me blaming you or looking for an apology.That was me saying how much I've missed you. You have _nothing_ to apologise for".

"Maybe..but it wasn't right. Me leaving without giving you all time to adjust to it".

"No" Saaya reassured as she felt the blonde's hands mould against the nape of her neck, "Even then, you had to do what was best for you. I'm just glad you're here".

To be forgiven so easily wasn't what Arisa was expecting. She knew she didn't deserve to not be met with some inveigh comments which would be warranted but at the same time, Saaya understood why she left the way she did.

If there was _one_ of her friends that would understand, it was her, it was _always_ her.

She laughed, a small sound of incredulous surprise as she tilted her head to the side, "Still the same old you. Kind to a fault".

"And you're still so cute" Saaya teased at the way Arisa had done that.

Not even five minutes with the keyboardist and Saaya was sure she was going to implode.

"S-saaya!".

The woman chuckled before putting some space between them, "Let's go, everyone is upstairs and my parents would be happy to see you if you feel up to seeing them. But if not, we can leave".

"Is your mother doing okay?".

"Much better" Saaya smiled, relief flooding her features as she tucked back an wayward blonde strand from the side of Arisa's head, "She has improved a lot over the last few years thankfully".

"I'm glad, Saaya".

Arisa mirrored the brunette's expression as she too was grateful for that. The health of Saaya's mother had impacted the woman throughout her life so to hear of something positive was reassuring.

"Now, let's go" Saaya said while she moved them towards the back and flashed the blonde a charming grin, "Would you believe I made some anmitsu today?". 

Arisa raised a brow at that, "Seriously?". 

"A strange coincidence, right? Maybe my Arisa senses were tingling". 

"Saaya..".

The brunette laughed heartily as Arisa narrowed her eyes in displeasure, or attempted to. 

All of their friends had often said that Saaya was eerily well tuned to Arisa's temperament so that wouldn't be so unusual. 

She smiled to herself, a genuine one in comparison to all the ones to date as she watched the brunette hair that was in a lower side ponytail lead the way. 

There was a lot of catching up to do, a lot of unsaid conversations that lingered between them but there was no rush.

Arisa wanted to savour the moment of being with Saaya after their hiatus apart.

***

By the time Arisa and Saaya had left the latter's home, it was around 9.

Upon the insistence of the brunette's parents, Arisa stayed for dinner as the full scope of their hospitality was just as she remembered, if not more welcoming if that was possible.

It felt pleasant, even though she couldn't admit it, to be around people again.

Life at the dorms in Kyoto had the sole purpose of shielding herself away from everyone she knew. She had inadvertently reverted back to her hermetic tendencies so it took a while for Arisa to familiarise herself with Saaya's family again and they understood, catering to whatever she needed without being overbearing.

It was no surprise that they were that way considering how Saaya herself had shaped up to be.

She had walked the blonde home, both enraptured in conversation as Arisa opened the door to her house, "They are as lovely as ever too".

Saaya grinned, "Well, my family do love you all and will be happy to show you just as much. Sana and Jun certainly showed that, didn't they?". 

"No kidding" Arisa replied, "It's unnerving how much they have grown too, even if they still are kids"

"Hm, we've all changed I guess"

Arisa stopped for a moment, looking down the hallway of her home as a rush of chilling air swept through her. 

The silence was overbearing and her heart clenched at not seeing the familiar figures of her grandparents. 

As soon as she had arrived, Arisa only hung around to make sure her belongings were delivered properly before heading back out and wondering around, deliberating on who to call first, who to see and her decision was a given. 

So in a sense, this was her first time back in the house and she wasn't sure how to deal with it. 

The loss plagued her, something she had grown so used to now that sometimes it felt numb.

But then that numbness caved in when she didn't hear her grandmother's kind voice welcoming her home.

Saaya was quick to come to the woman's aid, wrapping her arms around her from behind as she rested her chin on Arisa's shoulder, "You don't have to stay here tonight, Arisa. Come back to mine and we can figure out what you want to do once you've settled in. You can stay as long as you need to".

The offer was so tempting as Arisa pressed the side of her face against Saaya's cheek, feeling the warmth of her skin surround her as her hands rested over Saaya's arms, "If I don't do this now, I'll probably put it off forever" she replied, voice small, "Can you come with me?".

"Of course".

Saaya smiled reassuringly when she let the blonde go and reached for her hand, interlacing their fingers together as Arisa took a deep breath in.

Walking back into the past was never an easy journey but with Saaya there, Arisa gained some form of confidence to persevere while the remnants of the place she called home welcomed her back in.

The residence had been rented out for the time Arisa had been away so it was well kept by the previous tenant and they'd done a superb job of looking after the premises. They went through each room in the house, checking the windows and airing out the rooms if needed be.

During this process, Arisa didn't stray away from Saaya's side for too long.

It was eye opening for Saaya to experience this side of the blonde, tactile, _needing_ contact and it was an inclination to just how vulnerable Arisa was feeling.

As much as Arisa would have loved to see all of the others with Saaya, she knew she couldn't handle that right now and Saaya was the only one who understood the inner sanctums of her mind, her emotions, something she was grateful for.

It would take some time to acclimate herself again, not only being back in the house, but the town too.

Their inspection led them outside to the garden where Arisa's bonsai once resided but the area was now empty

She had sold them all before her departure.

The sight was surreal for the drummer as Arisa's pride and joy were her bonsai and rightfully so given the way she took care of them. So to see the wooden structure devoid of the plants felt like a lingering presence of a ghost, trapped behind a barrier that couldn't escape into their world.

She squeezed Arisa's hand in hers, offering a comforting smile.

"They'll be back.." Arisa divulged, "I.. _they_ loved the bonsai as much as I did so I am going to bring them back".

"I'm glad to hear that" Saaya replied, pleased that the blonde's bleak outlook could at least be broken into by the plants, "What else are we going to decorate with my hair accessories?".

Arisa grinned and rolled her eyes at that fond memory, "That was disastrous ".

"Hardly, they were the prettiest bonsai around" Saaya laughed with mirth.

The moment had aided to dissipate the anxious edge over Arisa's features as her eyes took in the sight of the warehouse and Saaya followed her gaze.

"So many memories".

Saaya had thought it but the blonde had spoken it out loud as she gently led the brunette to the building in question.

It had been sealed up since it was empty now.

No instruments resided there, Poppin'Party had disbanded after all.

Her fingers ran over the lock, the cold texture running up Arisa's hand as the wave of memories kept flooding back.

"That is what counts, right?" Saaya spoke up, "Memories were made, times we can always cherish and that was important to us".

"We could have had more if I didn't..".

"Arisa" Saaya gently said and took the woman's hands in hers, "I'll say this, and so will the others, as _many_ times as you may need to hear it. This was _not_ your doing. Expecting you to continue, to pretend that everything was okay was not even an option" she reassured and looked down into hazel eyes that were obscure due to the dark and the blonde fringe, "What is important to us is you. Once you see Kasumi, O-Tae and Rimi again, they'll tell you the same thing".

"R-really? Nobody hates me?".

The vulnerability and compunction emanated was crushing Saaya so harshly. It was only a handful of times that she had ever heard the other woman take on such a maudlin tone from her usual blunt self so it was starling, shocking that Arisa could even think of them harbouring such negative feelings for her.

She pressed the cold fingers in her hand and shook her head, "We love you, _I_ love you. Nothing you do would ever make us feel that way about you".

It was another dam being blown apart as Arisa felt herself being pulled into Saaya's embrace, her head buried into her chest as solid arms circled around her upper back.

Saaya could feel the tears impart with her top as she pressed her lips against the blonde hair, whispering comforting words of everything that Arisa needed to hear until the small shudders dispersed.

She knew Arisa would be harbouring a copious amount of guilt about what had happened, guilt that she had no reason to feel as she silently upbraided herself but that was Arisa in a nutshell, she felt things vividly despite her indifferent attitude.

She cared with everything she was comprised up of, be it for her family, friends and music.

So whether 3 years had passed by or not, Saaya knew it would take time for Arisa to come to terms with what had happened.

And she would stand by her through it all, something Saaya swore to herself and wrapped the smaller woman in her arms tighter.

After Arisa had calmed down enough once they returned inside, the duo had got to work on unpacking some of her things like the essentials.

The ornaments and trinkets that were scattered around the house had remained in place, resembling something of the home Arisa used to live in. She knew she would have to do a more thorough inspection of the house, figure out what needs to go and what can stay. That being said, she had already done most of that after a few months of her grandparents passing.

Everything that was left now were items she couldn't part with.

Her had lingered on a photo of her with her grandmother as she placed it back on the drawer, one of the few images she had taken after one of their concerts.

The feeling of them not being around crept up to the forefront of her mind as Saaya called her over from the kotatsu where she had some tea prepared for them.

Having Saaya there was another stark reminder as to what Arisa would have done if she was left alone to stew in her thoughts. She wasn't sure if she would have dared to do as much as she had done now with the woman.

She offered the brunette a thankful smile as they sat next to each other under the warm furniture, the TV showing something that neither were focused on.

It was getting late now when Arisa checked the time on her phone and she cleared her throat, "Hey".

"What is it?".

She looked at Saaya's alluring gaze, steeling herself whilst wondering if she was going to be asking for too much and the words struggled to come out of her mouth before Saaya called out to her again gently.

"Can you stay here..tonight, I mean? It's late and I don't want you heading back alone" she quickly added, squeezing the tips of her fingers over the edge of the table, "And I, I don't..".

_I don't want to be alone._

_I can't be alone right now._

_I need you._

It didn't need to be said as Saaya scooted closer till their shoulders were touching as she reached for Arisa's hand that was about to combust under the heat of the table.

"I'd be happy to stay with you, Arisa" she stated, "Despite everything and the circumstances, I'm so happy that you are back. So of course I want to spend more time with you so I'm here if you need me".

Arisa exhaled, "Thank you. I can't say that enough" she mumbled and let go of the wooden surface, "I..didn't mean to go off the radar after the first year away".

Their communication had dwindled after that time where only a few sparse messages were exchanged no matter how much Saaya tried.

It hurt the brunette but she didn't say it, not when the pain Arisa was going through outweighed them all but Arisa knew Saaya just as well as the latter knew her.

"And I know you're going to say it doesn't matter and that it is fine but you would be lying" she stated clearly, eyes locking into partially surprised blues, "We never got a chance to talk about us and how we left things. I accept that it was _my_ fault for not keeping in touch with you so for that, I truly am sorry, Saaya. I know I fucked up".

The brunette took a moment to take in the words before nodding, not being able to refute the arrant truth in what she had said, "It _did_ hurt. But not like that I guess. I was so worried about you. The distance, the lack of calls, not knowing if you were okay and it was too much but I understand, Arisa, I know why you had to just keep yourself to you".

"Not that it was fair on you, or the others" Arisa refuted, "It wasn't my intention to hurt you, not after everything you have done for me".

"That isn't going to change" the drummer reinstated and glanced at their hands joined together, "I'm not letting you out of my sight again, you do get that, right?" she smiled, "We have a lot of time to make up for. With everyone else, with you and me".

"Seriously, it's like your incapable of being mad at someone" Arisa jested with a shake of her head, "Well, other than that one time with Kasumi, of course".

"You make it sound like you want me to be angry with you" the brunette chuckled and sipped her tea.

Arisa shrugged, "You wouldn't be in the wrong for being so".

"How can I be when _you_ came to me first, Arisa?" Saaya said softly, "Even if you hadn't, it would have been fine but you came to find me".

"Usually you're the one finding me to make me feel better, to fix things" Arisa stated and took in the brunette's expression, "It was _always_ you and I know I didn't say it much back then but I appreciated it. Being away allowed me a lot of time to think. Losing my grandparents, my parents, I just don't want you to slip away from me, Saaya".

"That won't happen, I won't let it" Saaya said as she held the hazel eyes, pleading with her to never leave her alone, "You've been through so much. An unfair amount that I wish I could take away some of your burdens so if me being here with you helps you in any way, then that's what I'm going to do".

Arisa gulped, her heart beating rapidly at the warm words oozing from the brunette she could rarely stop thinking about when she was away.

Out if their group, Saaya had become her anchor, just keeping her in reality whenever she felt like she was going to fade away by becoming overwhelmed

Saaya was always there, a firm hand in hers, a gentle tap on her shoulder, a sweet smile.

A sign to let Arisa know that she'd never have to drift away.

"I missed you so much, Saaya" she whispered as the other woman's face moved closer to her own, their cheeks brushing against each other's as they remained together.

"Good, then maybe you'll have an inkling as to how I have been feeling without you here with me". 

She felt a palm tentatively place itself on her cheek which made her eyes close, fluttering at the tentative action, easing her into it. Their breaths mingled as Saaya continued to stroke her thumb across Arisa's jaw and then up her cheek as her lips brushed the corner of the blonde's mouth. 

Arisa just wished Saaya could have propagated the tentative gesture and kissed her on the lips instead.

A touch she was yearning for but didn't know how to convey so she opened her eyes, sensing that her face had flushed three shades darker.

She feigned a swat of her hand against Saaya's chest with no force and playfully castigated her, "You're such a softy".

"Hm, just like you" Saaya grinned, her fingers smoothing Arisa's hair that was let down, "You're exhausted"

Arisa muffled a yawn at the words with everything she could muster but it was futile and Saaya chuckled, "Yeah, I guess so".

"Come on, let's get ready for bed".

Sleep eluded both women.

There was something lingering in the air between them, something which had coalesced from the past but hadn't been completely addressed throughout their hours of catch up.

It had been touched upon here and there but the topic of discussion regarding picking up their relationship from before remained to be seen to.

With Arisa in her bed, Saaya was in the futon next her.

Both were wide awake as their general conversing continued whilst they got ready to sleep but eventually, it had draw to an end with the two wishing each other goodnight.

But neither would become enveloped in sleep with the presence of each other and the three years apart.

Arisa pulled the sheets up to her neck, her fingers wrapping around the material tighter than necessary as her thoughts spiralled to the brunette next to her.

Saaya wasn't fairing any better as her eyes bore into the ceiling, training her breathing to steady as much as possible.

"Saaya?".

A beat of a second passed.

"I'm awake" she replied with a small smile at Arisa, "Are you okay?".

"Yeah, sorry. Didn't mean to keep you up".

Saaya turned to her side to find the blonde in the same position.

With the glare of the moon coming in from the windows behind her, Arisa appeared radiant.

She wasn't the same girl that had left them, now maturate in every sense of the term. That much Saaya could deduce as her eyes ran over the refined features, the length of her hair increasing as those hazel orbs studied her diligently. She bit the inside of her cheek to stop herself from saying anything that would make the blonde recoil but it was difficult, she wanted to say everything and anything to see Arisa smile.

"What are you thinking?" she instead asked, assuming it would be safer ground.

Arisa stalled for a moment and Saaya could see her pursing her lips in the dimly lit room, "I..".

Her fingers around the sheets increased their hold as she breathed in when Saaya continued to watch her openly.

How was she meant to word it, that she wanted Saaya laying down next to her?

That she wanted to _feel_ her?

Her fingertips felt starved which was quite something since Arisa had hardly left Saaya's skin for too long and even then, it wasn't enough, she wanted the woman with her.

Saaya could see the confliction arise over Arisa's expression so she got up on her knees, just so that she could rest her arms on the blonde's bed without intruding on her space.

"You're making that face you make when you're thinking of a melody".

As always, Saaya hit the nail on the head.

Her thoughts about music and Saaya often became one and right now was no different.

"Same thing.." she mumbled more to herself.

"What was that?".

"Uh, nothing" she stammered before collecting herself, "Saaya?".

"Yes, Arisa?".

It was half teasing and half serious from what Arisa could deduce.

Her heart was leaping from her chest at the close proximity.

She could see the outline of Saaya's toned arms and after years of drumming and baking, they'd remained nicely shaped, soft to touch from what she could tell. The lack of light only helped in adding a more of a sultry glare in Saaya's dilated eyes that were becoming darker as she smirked, that smug yet innocuous smirk. Her brunette curls were let down, cascading down her chest and much longer than they were before from what she could tell. 

It was overwhelming and Arisa felt like her head was going to explode and her body too if she didn't do _something_ about this tension between them and now.

So she let out a groan of frustration before leaning forward and cupping Saaya's face with her palms, kissing her with ardent passion.

After the initial shock had washed away, Saaya succumbed to the soft lips nestled over her own as her hands carefully gripped the smaller woman's waist, squeezing them as their kiss found some rhythm, some level.

They both hummed due to the pleasure of the kiss as Saaya leaned forward since Arisa was pulling her in closer without the intention of breaking the kiss. So she aided the blonde and got up from the floor, one knee on the bed now before she hoisted her other leg over till she was hovering on top of Arisa without being on her body.

Her hands had planted themselves either side of Arisa's stomach as the blonde's hands gripped her hips, the feeling of soft fingers running over the expanse of her skin making Saaya shudder.

It was everything they had been expecting and so much more, like they were back in school again, hidden away sharing those longing kisses.

Near the staircase.

In front of the shrine.

Down in the basement.

But this was electrifying, so charged, so different.

They were not teenagers anymore, concealing their true emotions behind a wall of obliquity.

Arisa finally extracted her tongue out of Saaya's mouth as her head hit her pillow when she panted out Saaya's name.

The brunette was in a similar state as she wiped her lips with the back of her hand. Seeing the flustered blonde beneath her in her nightgown that hugged her frame made her fingers flex, wanting to map a journey over each curve and every dip.

It was only Arisa that could pull out this unadulterated desire she had welling within her, wrapped around with love and adoration and right now, she wanted to fuse herself within the woman.

So she lifted a hand, hovering it over Arisa's ribcage before locking eyes with her, "Arisa, can I touch you?".

Arisa's face was heated beyond it had ever been as her hand slowly gripped Saaya's upper arm, the other curving around the drummer's wrist that was over her ribcage and guided it to press her palm down. Her mouth opened, as if she was going to say something but it was replaced with a shiver, the feint trace of a moan prevalent and Saaya felt the blood rush in her head.

Arisa was _glowing_.

Even above the material of her nightgown, Saaya could feel her skin, feel the wavelength of her heartbeat that was going fast.

Way too fast, in fact.

Saaya quickly pulled her hand away, "Arisa, it's okay. We don't have to do this, I'm sorry, I-.

"No, it's not that!" Arisa objected and brought her head up so that she was in front of Saaya's face with the woman still leaning over her, "It's just that, well I..".

Arisa looked away for a minute and Saaya gave the woman all the time she needed.

The concerned expression remained on Saaya's face when Arisa glanced back at her and her eyes were filled with nothing but gentle warmth, the kind Saaya exuded.

There was nobody else she felt safe with, safe enough to do this.

She gulped, licked her lips and then spoke up. 

"I..haven't had sex before".

It was quiet but Saaya heard it clearly enough, her eyes widened slightly and she was about to back off completely to give Arisa her space when the blonde's arms circled behind her shoulders and held her there.

"I'm sorry, Arisa! I-" she apologised but the lips pressing against her own silenced the rest of that sentence.

Saaya had to hold Arisa's waist to keep them upright but at an angle as the steamy sensation of Arisa's mouth on hers eased down her own heartbeat as they pulled away.

"You didn't let me finish, dummy" she chided and ran a hand through the brunette locks, "I want to do it with _you_ , Saaya".

Saaya's heart clenched at the way those eyes were laced with honesty, desire and need.

Her voice was slightly husky, a tone Saaya wasn't used to from Arisa since they were breathing heavy. 

She didn't want to hurt Arisa in any way and as much as she wanted the blonde, _loved_ her, if there was even an inkling of hesitancy, Saaya would never push her.

"Are you sure? You've just got back today and there is still so much on your mind".

"I said I had a _lot_ of time to think..and I don't want to keep wasting more time" she answered, cupping Saaya's cheek so that she could read her clearly, "I have wanted you for so long and I've been a coward about it but I'm done with that, done with waiting, waiting until I lose everything. I love you, Saaya and I want this with you, okay?".

There was no hesitancy in the voice.

There was no apprehension in those eyes.

There were no doubts.

Saaya could hear and see the way Arisa wanted to take this step with her.

As if she had had an afflatus the second their bodies had met.

So she smiled, exhaling over the woman's lips as they both shared a chuckle at the intensity of the situation.

"I love you too, Arisa".

Arisa's body relaxed enough for Saaya to gently lower her back onto the bed.

She then moved down just as slowly into Arisa's open arms as they kissed again, bodies slotting together in a way that appeared like it was meant to be as they gave into each other.

Because they were meant to be.

This much they could guarantee as they reconnected in every way. 

A few hours later, Arisa's knees buckled whilst she was on top of Saaya, lurching forward slightly as her hair brushed over Saaya's face. The pressure of Saaya's hips colliding with her own sent her over the edge again so she crumbled down and rolled off from the brunette after landing on her chest.

The air between them was intoxicating. 

A break, she needed a breather. 

Saaya was just as insatiable as she was. 

So Arisa stumbled to the side of the bed, curled up in the brunette's arms with her back pressing against her chest.

Her brain was still on overdrive while she continued to come down from the numerous highs and veneration that Saaya had provided. The woman was doing the same since she could feel each exhale of Saaya's breath against her bare shoulder, lips brushing along her skin which made her tingle. The arms around hips near the sheets kept her grounded, even if she was still on a solid surface.

Nothing could have prepared her for such an amazing experience with Saaya and if the drummer could see her expression now, that very sentiment would be tangible.

Not that Saaya needed to see her to know what she was feeling as Arisa had made clear just exactly _what_ Saaya had made her feel.

The pulsing tension between them had lessened to a slight degree, more calming as opposed to feeling like they would come out of their own skin if they didn't touch each other.

Arisa did not think she would be capable of feeling that much desire to begin with and when her reprieve was granted for the first time, it was like a flash of yellow overtook her eyes each time Saaya made her feel alive.

But this part, this gentle lapse of activity here while they were gathering their minds with slight brushes of fingertips against skin and lips skimming over curves was just as perfect.

Arisa couldn't have been in a better place right now.

She snuggled back further into Saaya's form, sighing at the warm skin melding with her own when she settled on Saaya's arm that was beneath her neck. Her body felt hazy, light in a way that it could happily go off into a slumber but Arisa's mind couldn't be further away from those sentiments.

Her thoughts kept replaying, hands twitching, acting out the way she grabbed onto Saaya whenever she was satiated.

She was convinced that the imprints were left on the brunette's skin which made her flush further, if that was remotely possible.

"Arisa, if you get any warmer, I'm seriously thinking of taking you in the bath to cool you down".

Arisa groaned at Saaya's teasing and wording, her brain running wild at her connotations, "I'm fine, I just..".

She felt a delicate kiss to her shoulder, "You don't have to explain. As long as you feel okay".

"Yeah, _that_ would be an understatement" she chuckled as Saaya did the same at the insinuation of her words.

"I'm glad though, I was worried that I went too far" Saaya said after a second of silence, her fingers ghosting over Arisa's stomach, feeling the skin react, "You sure you're okay?".

"I promise" Arisa assured, "You were..you know" she drawled off but hoped the brunette would understand the train of thought.

If she turned to see Saaya, Arisa would have noticed an extra glow to her cheeks too. Saaya had gone out of her way to try and ensure that the experience was as pleasant for Arisa as could be. It was both a distraction and an opening for the woman so she wanted to ensure that Arisa was mentally and physically satisfied.

"As long as you’re okay".

A hum from the blonde permeated the air as they remained in the cocoon of comfort they had created.

Being here with Saaya again was a reminder as to what she had left behind, what she had to abandon for a time just to order her thoughts out. Arisa had no idea what was to come in terms of the future after everything that had happed and the prospect of losing what she and Saaya had been daunting for her.

Arisa gripped the arm around her stomach tighter as she felt Saaya cover her protectively.

"Whatever you decide, know that I'll be right here with you" Saaya reminded, "There is no rush in figuring things out".

"You're right. I just don't want people that I care about to slip away. I don't think I could handle it again, Saaya".

The slight dip in the blonde's voice prompted the drummer to nuzzle the nape of her neck, "It won't end up like that anymore. Not unless you want it to".

"But I was close to losing you again".

Saaya became even more alert, "What do you mean?".

Arisa slowly turned around and freed Saaya's arm that was being used as a pillow as she sat up slightly, her hand resting on her cheek while she looked down into Saaya's eyes.

"Maybe this isn't the right time to ask this but was..there someone else?" Arisa enquired, "You've done this before".

"Ah.." Saaya managed, her finger still resting on the other woman's hip now as she gauged her reaction, "I was with someone for a while, you're right".

"Who was it?".

There never would be a correct time to discuss this and if Arisa had figured it out, then she had no intention of lying to her about it.

"Sayo".

"Wait, what?" Arisa replied, trying to keep her voice in check. Her throat was already scratchy as it was now but the surprise in her tone must have been evident enough, "Hikawa Sayo?" she repeated, "I would _never_ have guessed her in a million years".

"It was unexpected for us too" Saaya chuckled, relieved that Arisa didn't look pissed at least, "It was maybe a year ago where we started seeing each other. I guess we had the same thought in mind".

"How so?".

"Pining for someone we didn't really know where we stood with" Saaya answered, averting the hazel orbs for a while as she recalled the time she and Sayo had spent together, "She was in a place where I had found myself often. Not knowing how to get out of it so we ended up hanging out, getting closer and then one thing led to another".

Arisa could think of two people that Sayo seemed to have an outward liking to, wondering which brunette it could have been.

But she kept her gaze on Saaya's expression that had gone far away so she placed her hand on the side of Saaya's neck, bringing her back. The guilt returned by the tenfold as she was ready to try and offer some respite for leaving her but Saaya shook her head and kissed her palm when she bought the smaller hand up.

"It doesn't matter now, Arisa" she gently explained and sat up in a similar way that Arisa was, "Whatever happened with me and Sayo back then was just that. She knew it wasn't what _this_ is" she motioned to them both, "I'm just so relieved that you are back and I hope that knowing this hasn't changed your mind about me and-".

"Don't be silly" Arisa sighed and leaned forward, pressing her lips against her lover's, "It's not like we were seeing each other. I made that even more difficult for you by not speaking to you so, I, I'm fine with it" she relayed, "What I _do_ know for sure is that I love you, Saaya. I hope we can give us a chance".

The expression of relief coated the brunette's striking features as she inched closer to Arisa, covering the side of her body when she nudged the blonde back down onto the mattress, "I want nothing more. It has only ever been _you_ in here. I love you" she stated softly and pressed Arisa's hand over her chest.

The rhythmic thudding of the drummer's heart was hypnotic, lulling Arisa as she sunk into the blue eyes gazing at her with so much longing and love.

For three years she had abstained from anything to do with her life here in Tokyo.

For three years she had become lost in the grief of those she had loved.

For three years she had held herself back.

And yet, Saaya was still here, offering her a place in her heart without a second thought.

Arisa wasn't going to let this bond between them dissipate like she had done in the past.

If anything, everything that had happened to date, from Poppin'Party to this moment with Saaya was a stark reminder of how fleeting and flexible life was.

How in a manner of minutes, anything or anyone could be taken away.

So she refused to let that happen again before her eyes, especially when it came to Saaya.

Sentiments that she whispered over Saaya's lips when she brought her in to kiss her.

There was no point in hesitating to reach for what she wanted.

Wasn't that the message of what most of their songs were composed up of, songs she had helped to write and with Saaya no less?

Perhaps it was time to take her own advice and keep on moving with her life, cherishing every moment more than she ever had done in the past.

And with Saaya by her side, that seemed like an easy goal to adhere to.

Life was too transient to take for granted. 


End file.
